Ah, Christmas... Yuletide cheer, Boxing Day sales, Philip White Freight, and you.

WELL, Philip White Freight Towers was the scene of an impressively calm and low-key Christmas day. Which after the full-bore nature of recent months was precisely what common sense dictated. So from this point of serenity may I wish you one and all, the merriest of festive seasons. And, to quote the tipsy bloke who wandered past our window yesterday night in a happy, shouty mood, "Happy Birthday Jesus, mate".

A modern Christmas is on one hand a celebration with its roots in idolatry both pagan and Christian. On another, it's the totem around which families traditionally gather, for a few days of psychological ferment and/or warm togetherness. Accordingly, we're off to Leigh on Sea later today, for a gathering of the PWF clan. Based as we are in Dorset this will involve passing both Bluewater and Lakeside shopping mega-malls, which reminds me that Christmas is also home to Boxing Day (and onwards) sales. Which brings me to you, chers Alpiniards...

…because, should a sale either real or online locate the sofa of your dreams, bathroom suite of your deepest desires or any of the myriad and often astounding objets that wing their way to the Alps under our care, let it be known that a couple of PWF services will be available during January to relocate them to chez vous. Our Dorset warehouse stands ready to receive, or indeed we can operate a door-door kinda service.

Danny Boy responding to Broadsword: Philip White Freight is back in the office! With November service dates at hand…

CHERS amis

Over the last few days Philip White Freight has been much on the road. Consequently we have been little in the office. To those of you feeling the chill of neglect, we apologise profusely. Yesterday at 10.30pm, after a 19.5-hour day, it was either you lot or a G&T. Guess which won…

Suffice to say that having cured its ills with gin and sleep, PWF is all attentive service once more - wading stoically through the inbox and supplying transport solutions ("cunning plans", in local parlance) with our usual insouciance and questionable charm.

To whit, the next service will leave the UK on 03 Nov, getting to the Alps a couple of days later. Another couple of days on, it will return to the UK.

'Tis the season to be ordering things for chalet refurbs, furniture for the winter season and all the other stuff with which you so constantly amaze and surprise us. Therefore the PWF warehouse in Dorset is at your disposal as a delivery destination - unless of course you want us to pick things up from a private or commercial address. We're flexible like that, you see.

WAY back when, we were involved with the reconstruction of an Italian farmhouse. So I was neither fazed nor surprised when a client called me yesterday with news: his Italian build is running late, moving his moving-in date somewhat.

Why, I guess you're wondering, should you care? Because if you were thinking of sending something on the PWF van service setting off tomorrow, but were too late to get it together, you've now got until Friday (02 Oct). I've had a happy rearrange in my diary. The service will deliver and pick up things in the Alps over the weekend, then return to Britain untroubled by any need to trundle into Italy. Meraviglioso!

In the meantime I'm off to attack parts of the To Do list that thought they'd got away with remaining undisturbed, and possibly even give the abject filth of PWF Towers a bit of a vacuum.

Buona giornata, tutti!

Phil White
Philip White Freight

Pour qui ca concerne: Philip White Freight's almost dead pig-free early October van service bulletin.

WELL, bonsoir, chers Alpiniards tous.

As our beloved leader heads to the doctor to seek a cure for the severe case of pork scratchings his friend Mr Ashcroft has given him, thoughts at PWF Towers turn away from the tawdry goings-on up in Westminster. Such things are beneath our notice, as we have Octobre to consider (and they're not our style, anyway).

While an assault on the rump of the month remains unplanned (although it will surely see action, hungry old thing that it is), its gaping maw will see us drive right on in. For the next PWF van service will quit our West-country bastion on Tuesday 29 Sept. It'll trot into the Alps on Thurs 01 Oct. On 04 Oct, shunning the glare of publicity, it shall head right on back to good old Blighty. 


Our Dorset warehouse awaits the bi-fold doors, bathroom hardware, sofas, paint, plumbing equipment and gammon joints that may or may not constitute your (or your builder's) heart's desire.

A bientot, mes amis. I'm off to the Boar's Head...

Erm...

Hmm.

Phil White
Philip White Freight

That Philip White of whom you speak, he'll be down next week - July van service reminder

'ALLO. And indeed, 'allo.

Disclosing an unusually organised communications strategy, this follows last week's two-week warning. The PWF van will leave home on 13 July (next Monday). It has a few pickups to make in Blighty, and will trundle into the Alpine vastness early on 15 July. After a couple of days' work, it will head back to the UK, hoping like mad that MyFerryLink staff don't take it into their heads to set the channel tunnel afire once more.

The super-marvellous PWF warehouse here in scenic Dorset is at your disposal should you go shopping (a client has found a source of cheap Smeg fridges. Let us rejoice!), and the paint emporia of Dorchester are available if you're in decorating mode. Or we can work for you in a door-to-door kind of way.

Alas, while the Met Office threatened rain today the benificent microclimate of this lovely place means the clouds floateth dryly away to tiddle on somewhere further East. So must I with heavy heart take my leave of you, and go water the allotment after all. Bugger.

A bientot, chers Alpiniards.

Phil White

Philip White Freight

Oh my eye, it's nearly July! A Philip White Freight service date for you.

BON Mardi, chers Alpiniards

Living in the darkest South-West of England I am surrounded by atavists and pagans. Or so it would appear from the raggety droves that descended upon the region for the summer solstice a couple of days ago. It brought two thoughts to the fore: one went along the lines of "Why don't they all bugger off home instead of driving in flocks around the place when I want to get on with things?" The other was an inchoate yell of "Lordy me, it's nearly July already!"

The rump of June/nose of July is a crowded period here at PWF Towers. Partly thanks to Mrs White running an ultra in Italy, and partly due to work. As a result, the first July service will leave the UK on 13 July, and hit the Alps on 14 or 15 July. It will return a couple of days later.

As ever, the PWF warehouse is open to receive, well, wares. We also collect from your suppliers or your home.

A note about the future: due to a reorganisation of both the way we do things, and the way Mrs PWF works, a more frequent and regular service will shortly be available. I'm not going to bother your pretty heads with the details, but improvement is in the air. Give me a few weeks to get it all together, but it looks damn good.

Righto. To Italy. I bought a Panama yesterday, thus equipping me to support Mrs W's ultra assault in fine style - snoozing next to a chilly beer with my hat tipped over my nose. Cin cin!

A bientot,

Phil White

Philip White Freight

Welcome to the cheap seats: Cyan Teak Furniture's affordable quality shocker

BONJOUR, tout le monde.

Day of leisure be damned - here I am, tapping away at a hot Mac instead of heading for the beach. Which is frankly the best way to do a bank holiday if you live in a tourist trap like Dorset. All sorts of wonders will spew through Cyberspace from this office today, from much-delayed documentation to the schedule for the Early June Philip White Freight service to and from the Alps. Watch this space.

First though, a plug. We do this for businesses that we have worked with and found excellent. And Cyan Teak Furniture is really rather fine. It offers good-quality outdoor furniture (made from Teak, it seems), at prices so reasonable that several clients have still found it a bargain after paying our extortionate transport costs on top. A massive 'Lutyens' bench recently went to a very happy client down by Lac Leman, the perfect vantage point from which to ruminate on the limpid waters, and stuff.

From our standpoint, Cyan communicates well, has stock in when it says it has, and even makes us a cup of tea when we collect. So all-in-all, a company that I'm very happy to recommend to you, mes amis. Check it out at: http://cyan-teak-furniture.com.

And so away, to administrations new. Well actually to the kettle. The merest mention of tea has plunged me into a terrible thirst. Time for a brew.

Amietés

Phil White

Philip White Freight

Soon is the month of Maying, when Sprinter vans are playing: Philip White Freight has a mid-May service in mind.

BONJOUR, chers Alpiniards.

As I've been working rather too hard recently, I spent the morning hacking around Lulworth in Dorset, accompanied by my friend Stuart and my dog. Sun, sea and as it turned out, a pint of cider. Magical.

And illusory. For here I am back in the PWF office, talking to you about May. Because on the 12th of that fine month we shall set forth on a voyage Alpenwards. We will arrive late on 13 May, and spend the 14th delivering and picking up the vivid array of things you lovely people choose to ship to and fro. Then we shall return to the increasingly sunny embrace of dear old Blighty.

Ideally I would sit back now and await your mails, sucking philosophically on another pint of Old Rosie. In reality however, a load schedule, some accounting and the school run await. April, as an American once wrote, is the cruellest month...

A bientot, mes amis

Phil White

Spring! Forward! The Philip White Freight van in April

BONJOUR, tout le monde.

Next weekend we will be robbed of an hour’s kip. But after a coffee or two all shall be forgiven, as spring is allegedly here and ever-lengthening evenings stretch ahead. Oh, and Easter will be upon us.

Philip White Freight Towers is situated in the lovely county of Dorset, which is very much like living in the Alps. Not literally of course – the skiing in Lulworth is pretty woeful and you can’t parapente off the Cerne Abbas giant. But in the matter of being very popular during school holidays, oh yes… much like having a home in Cham or similar. This year the season of bunnies, eggs, crucifixion and resurrection will be marked by basically half my family and friends dropping by to indulge in country walks, coastal paddling and the wholesale destruction of cider and cream teas.

Naturally, instinct bids me to flee, to leap into my van and head south. But I’ve been informed by a higher power (Mrs White) that such an act should be regarded as verboten. So the early April PWF service will leave on 10 April, heading for the Alps. I will trundle into town a couple of days later, then return to Blighty.

The usual notices apply: should you be ordering things, they can come to our warehouse in Dorchester to join the wagon train. Or indeed, we can work door-door. Fire enquiries off via the Contact button on this very website.

So without further ado, bon Pacques, Alpiniards all. See you on the other side…

Caledonia dreaming… Philip White Freight plots a Scottish incursion

THERE is a place dear to our hearts, a place of rocks and mountains liberally swathed in snow. A place where log fires burn bright in the darkness of the night. A place where rugged, craggy men speak in strange, foreign tongues. Oh yes mes amis, I speak of Scotland.

More specifically, we are planning a trip to England's bonny brother, a place that we get to rather rarely. This does present an opportunity to collect goods from the far-flung north (I include the topmost bits of England in this term) without the massive surcharge that a bespoke run up there would generate. Therefore I throw the information out there, in case there are among you those who harbour a desire to have things brought from l'Ecosse to la France. Our next run to the Alps, as insinuated in previous mails, will leave our Dorset lair around 07 March (exact dates to be confirmed shortly, but that's the general idea).

Awa' wi'ye now, and bon ski!

The rides of March - Philip White Freight considers its next service

AH, here you find me, making bad puns about the words of a fictional soothsayer to Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. But then, 'tis Friday the 13th. Fortunately, this fell day is to be followed by the glories of Feb 14th, when my thoughts shall turn to a different kind of seize her. Oh, lucky Mrs White...

Valentines' day means many things to many people, but amid the chocolate tributes, bath produce sales and the sight of many a man trudging around a wet Dorchester bearing floral arrangements, it occurs to me that half of February has whizzed by. In my case, mostly in a blur of driving, warehouse work and administration. In yours, a spray of lovely powder. It's time to consider March, mes amis.

Dates are not yet fixed for the March schedule, but anyone ordering sofas etc (lots of you seem to be in the market for sofas at the moment) should consider that the month's initial PWF service is likely to leave the UK around 07 March. It will head Alpenwards, slither around for a few days, then trudge back to the dankness of the UK.

As ever, the Dorchester warehouse is open to receive goods. Or to store your things should you be moving back and have discovered that the contents of two houses don't fit in one.

Alors, mes braves - may tomorrow be filled with love, smiles, cocoa-based snacks and the scent of flowers. If we survive today, that is…

BON Samedi, mes amis

Here's hoping that you're all whizzing gleefully downhill rather than pratting about reading emails. But for the cyber-detainees among you, oh yea, oh yea, hear ye this (sorry. Encountered Dorchester's European champion town crier, ghost story teller and balls-out lunatic Alistair Chisholm yesterday. Feeling strangely affected. If you're wondering where this digression came from, check out https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aP9EoU0ndOA). As advertised previously (this is just a reminder for those late shoppers among you - and frankly, late shoppers are legion), the PWF early Feb service will quit fair Dorchester town on 04 Feb, heading towards the Alps. In these fair mountains 'twill trundle on 06 and 07 Feb, before returning to Merrie England.

While the usual mix of the mundane and mental is already booked aboard, there be always room for a little 'un. As ever, the PWF warehouse here in Dorchester is at your disposal for the reception of items from suppliers too unaccommodating to deliver to France, or we can work door-door.

Bon ski, chers Alpiniards

Phil White
Philip White Freight

It'll be coming round the mountain… the Philip White Freight van, that is. New dates, mes amis.

WELL, I've only just given up bellowing Happy New Year! at everyone I meet or greet, like a dementedly cheery extra from a Will Ferrel movie… and already February looms on the calendar. The year's second month means two things in this office – one, that I'd best start thinking about Mrs PWF's birthday present; two, that I'd better let you lovely lot know the dates of the next Philip White Freight service. It leaves the UK on 04 Feb, and should get to the Alps the next day. We'll be in Chamonix, St Gervais, Morzine and that sort of place over two days, then we'll turn North again.

The PWF warehouse in Dorchester is at your disposal should you inadvertently buy some furniture, crockery, a bathroom suite or a pair of six-foot cuddly Polar bears (I kid you not…) in the January sales.

And so I leave you, chers Alpiniards, and wander into the distance wondering what on earth Mrs PWF might like for her birthday (she's not really into Polar bears, unfortunately). Until we meet again, mes amis…

2015: the road ahead

THANK you for 2014, Alpiniards. We did a lot of work last year. January 2015's first Philip White Freight service is just around the corner, and a whole new year begins. A quick audit of 2014 reveals a dizzying variety of cargo, transported both to and fro. It also highlights the wonder and variety of you marvellous people, those with enough poetry in their soul to live, work or play in the French Alps. I would be the first to admit that driving around in a van is right up there with painting ceilings for fist-eating dreariness. But the people I deal with at either end of every journey are a boundless source of entertainment and pleasure. Some of you are inspired, others inspiring. The odd one is clearly downright mental, which can only be a good thing. In a former life I was a journalist, writing pretty lies about people and their cars in magazines. I remain a professional gossip, which makes you brilliant lot my bread and butter in much more than just a balance sheet kinda way. So merci, mes amis. Have a wonderful 2015 – I'll catch you along the way…